Reader Questions : On Ageing Gracefully

I may be blowing wind here, but I like to think that my little corner of the internet fills a gap. I began this blog years ago at the suggestion of some good friends who were pleased with the blossoming menswear style blog boom, but disappointed that nothing at the time addressed stylish men of meager means.  In time, I've come to realize through emails and meeting people that I also tend to appeal to younger men in need of basic and unpretentious help (yikes, that was probably pretentious) as well as older men looking to keep things fresh without dressing like kids.

Reader Mark writes:

You said in your post "I'm not 22 years old and rail thin". That brings up a question:


What are good looks for heavier guys in their late 40s-early 50s? I don't want to appear to "try" to be dressing too young, yet I'm not really antique in age either!

A good question, to be sure. Hope I'm up to the task. What follows may not be so much direct advice on "looks" as it is on knowing your history, knowing whats going on, knowing what suits you, keeping it classic and simple, and combining all that...I hope.

As our example of how to look good, age appropriate, and young at heart all at once, we'll use the extreme example of style icon Fred Astaire.  Plenty has been written about this man's level of style in his prime in the '30s, '40s and '50s, but very little mentions how well he carried himself into old age. Finding good pictures of Astaire in his youth is easy, but finding photos of the man in later life was surprisingly difficult. I suppose that speaks to the good old American youth obsession (the opposition to which this blog was founded, see profile). 

In the photo above, a 75 year old Astaire gives his relatively staid jacket and tie ensemble just the right pinch of insouciance in his choice of aviator sunglasses, a favorite of youth today. The lesson here is opt for items which will always be classic and also "cool", in this case the glasses. Military men wear them, bikers wear them, rock stars wear them, hipsters wear them, even a confident 75 year old wears them. In each case they are "cool". In the old guys case, they are a sign that he is cool, and has been for some time. And yet, they don't diminish the classic-ness of his overall look, and they are anything but inappropriate.

This photo, like the one above, is a still from 1974s The Towering Inferno. Sure, it's dated. The tie is huge, the lapels are too. But that's the point. Being older doesn't necessarily mean you have to avoid trends like the plague, you just have to play them carefully. Astaire's tux is very 1974, yet because it is also relatively classic, he manages to be of the moment without looking like he's dressing like a kid. Despite the wideness of the elements, there are no ruffles on the shirt front, not frilly cuffs, no extra velvet, and no silly colors. Similarly today an older man may opt to lean towards the currently trendy leaner cuts while keeping his  fabrics and patterns classic.

In this bad photo from the bad 1981 movie Ghost Story, an 82 year old Astaire wears his coat collar flipped youthfully up with a schoolboy scarf knotted in a particularly youthful way. Growing older doesn't mean you need to turn into a stiff, or even a dork. It just means that all the things you learned and saw, all the goofy stuff and good stuff you wore, all your sartorial mistakes and triumphs should begin to cook down to a refined essence that is uniquely yours and exists outside the realm of age and time. Am I getting too philosophical here? Certainly.  

The point I guess is to stick with classic pieces in classic cuts and always insist on quality. At the same time, keep an eye on trends and choose selectively those aspects which will keep you looking fresh without looking like a mid-life crisis. And never wear anything that doesn't fit well. Young skinny 22 year olds can wear all the short pants and too tight jackets they want. They'll still look foolish, but we'll collectively chalk that up to youth and gullibility and hope they grow out of it. Older (and heavier) men do not enjoy such leniency.
 
Of course, it helps to have been this cool in your youth:
 

In writing this little blip, I realize that in this one short question we have a loaded sartorial topic on our hands, one that deserves frequent revisiting. I've only just poked at it with a stick. So lets have this be a discussion. I'd like to see this topic grow alongside a discussion of learning the basics for younger men. As much as I enjoy handing down the law from high on my soap box, I enjoy learning from others as well.

Thank you Mark for opening this can of worms. I hope we catch some big fish.

Another Go 'Round

These "online custom" companies sure do seem to want my opinion on the matter these days. Recently, Tailor4Less offered me a trial shirt. I ordered it last night.

In a cotton plaid they call "Texas". In perfect keeping with my rube tendancies in the world of "custom" shirts, I ordered this otherwise innocuous plaid with a high spread collar and Fench cuffs. With a simple tie, silk knot cuff links, light grey flannels and a blue blazer, this could be my Christmas party go-to. That is, if it comes off well.

I've had both good and bad experiences with online tailoring. Let's see how these guys stack up. They promise delivery in two weeks, so results should be in soon.

Dangerously Close to the Edge

It's no secret I like to push the edges of what is correct and appropriate in the broader realm of "classic" menswear. That's because I enjoy clothing, I have fun wearing it, and I'm not actually ever required to dress better than jeans and a t-shirt. I've been known to don an outfit that many find to be far too much, and frequently at that. I admit this freely. Yet sometimes, I come to the proverbial edge of the sartorial cliff and actually manage to stop myself from jumping. To wit:

Rugby has a "make your own cardigan" page on their website, and this is the number I nearly bit on in the last few days. Rugby is a brand I generally steer clear of, not so much because of any outright disdain, though I'll admit to mild disdain. No, it's more because I'm not 22 years old and rail thin, and I take myself a little more seriously than proper carriage of the brand would require. And Lord knows, few things are as unforgivably affected as Ye Olde Skull & Bones these days. Still, the idea of this sweater still appeals to me, forgive me. I see it with dark jeans, oxford shirt and brown pebble grain shoes. Or bright colored cords, bow tie and toggle coat, with a tweed cap. But, alas, I'm not 22, and this may in fact be too "young" for me.

If only it were wool instead of cotton...if only it had wooden buttons...if only it didn't have leather elbow patches....if only it weren't Made in Sweatshop...if only it weren't $148...if only I didn't know better...

See? I am capable of the occasional bout of self control after all...until the thing goes on sale, probably.

Glen Check Ties

A nice alternative for Autumn, in silk, wool, or a blend. Don't forget the glen check tie.

This one in tan,burgundy and hunter green silk is a US made number by Polo, ($1.00). Acquired years ago, I don't wear it enough. Quiet enough to be dressy, but rich enough to knock the office vibe off of this old charcoal striped suit. Plays well with a cashmere coat for a trip to an off Broadway theatre.

p.s. please forgive the gratuitous linking to my own stuff. Shameful, I know. But I'm experiencing camera difficulty and I already had this picture saved.

p.p.s. new items in the Shop, including suits, coats, and lots of shoes. Stop by and browse.

Pontification

Last Friday, I was a participant in a discussion on the meanings, past and present, of so called "preppy fashion" following a performance of A.R. Gurney's play Children. I can be seen below pontificating on the matter, speaking with my hands as any self respecting Italian would. 



photo credit: a friend in the audience

I'd like to thank the TACT theatre group for inviting me to be a part of this. I had a great time, and met some wonderful people. As for the play, I say two thumbs up. A single scene on the terrace of a Cape Cod island beach house sets the tone for this sad yet darkly humorous tale of the unravelling of an old WASP family in the early 1970s. The cast of four played it to the hilt, making us feel both contempt and compassion for each of them, and in the end, everything works out for the best, but not in the way one might expect. Go see it if you can.

In other pontifications:

Sadly, the comments in my last post became a soapbox for racist vitriol by a number of anonymous commenters.  I don't intend to ignore this. As much as I'd like to keep this clothing blog from becoming a political showdown, some things can't be ignored. Unfortunately, I will be forced to rethink the openness of my comments policy. This is not some Massachusetts Liberal Political Correctness game. I simply will not tolerate this kind of behavior on my blog any more than I would in my own house.

How To Wear a Hat

Like you mean it...

 photo credit: not sure, but I heisted it from "Where Is The Cool"

The kid in the middle gets a pass for wearing a double breasted suit. Otherwise, a "rakish tilt" is always a nice touch, and these kids have been taught well. Imagine how difficult it would be to find five grown men you know and line them up for a photo and have it look this killer. And that's just the word for it, killer. These kids are strong and confident, and I can tell not just by what they're wearing but how they're wearing it.

p.s. I'm off to New York tomorrow. More shallow drivel Sunday or Monday. Your humble "pedant" needs a few days off to "get over" himself. (see comments to the last post...the one about socks with ducks on them)

Cheap Commodities

Life sometimes lands you in such undesirable places as Target. The place may be a monument to all the reasons why the rest of the world feels the way they do about Americans, but they do have some pretty good socks now and then.

This pair features a duck in flight and a purple toe. Packaged with a second pair in black and grey mini herringbone weave, $5.00. Not bad. Should be all the rage between a pair of dark denim jeans and L.L.Bean rubber mocs (used to call those "duck shoes" in the old days).